DOORs... such conTRAPtions

Everyday, we are faced with choices that are pivotal to what lies ahead.

" What do I want?"
" Who am I?"
" Who or what do others see me as?"
" Do I really know my strengths? Am I honest about my weaknesses?"

Do we look into the mirror and not see who we are? Do we fear looking into the mirror and realise you do not recognise that person in it?

It's easy to say " One Life. Live it." OR " Just Do it" ..... but is it?

Often what defines us are the commitments we have made to or for others in our lives. Can we live ours?

All my life all I ever did was to study... study....train.... train...do well in sports.... get the good grades... be in the best stream and class.... get yourself a place in University.... grab that scholarship... get that decent well-paying job blah blah. Yes, I've done that. Well on my way.

BUT WHY AM I NOT HAPPY?

And then suddenly one day, you realise that you can be good at other things as well... you've missed out on so much....and oh how you wish... commitments arent pinning you down... it's like I'm living a life for others to be comfortable with.

The torment that the clock is ticking ... but you're not the one moving....

It's frustrating. It's agonizing. It's torturous. It reduces anyone to tears.

Can we ever be selfish enough to just drop all the baggage and say... from now on... the only responsibility is ME . My OWN. Can we? I doubt.

So exactly when do we see that door of opportunity opening? When do we see it close?

Life is not smooth.
Everyday, we get numerous doors slammed in our faces. I know I have been.

Few out there are willing to share their successes or let you have one yourself. They are cruel. They are self-centred. They don't want to see you succeed. They don't even want to know you exist at all. But who can blame them?

Your anxiety, your limitations, your plea for that chance... Do you think anyone listens?

And then there are those doors that open SO BIG that it makes one wary as to what lies through it. Can it be that simple? After all that I've been through?

So let's consider? What have I got to lose? EVERYTHING? or... NOTHING?

To be or not to be... that's the hardest question of all.



......and I'll still forever be that small boy... by the corner... weeping and pleading... and nobody knows or cares..... until I stand up and yell... and may be they will start noticing... or not... and continue with they daily doings... No harm done .

I think I've gotten my answer.